Monday, May 20, 2013

Movie Buddies

My movie buddy skipped town.  Okay, so my movie buddy was my mom and she had to go back to working her full-time job after a 3 month vacation during which we saw Oblivion, Iron Man 3 and Olympus Has Fallen among others.  So I kinda blame my mother for sending me into a tailspin of the dreaded "Single Blues".  Don't get me wrong, I'm really comfortable being single these days and am okay with the idea that I might always be.  To be honest, it usually bothers other people much more than it bothers me that I'm 36 and single.  I feel like I have finally come into my own and I like not having to answer to anyone.  I enjoy my freedom and independence.  When I think about what a man can do for me, I'm pretty sure whatever that is, I can do it for myself and ten times better.  Nevertheless, this does not solve the movie buddy problem.

The second runner up as a movie buddy, my sister, is really busy taking over the world with her 10 25 32 kids.  Alright, alright, it just seems like 32.  Third runner ups are the girlfriends, the one getting her doctorate at Duke University (always studying), the newly pregnant (too sick) and the recent graduate (crazy as a junebug).  Seriously, the newly pregnant and I have been trying to set up a get-together for a month now.  Maybe I smell.

So to solve my movie buddy woes I signed up on the website www.blackpeoplemeet.com.  You know,  to meet new people, socialize, yada yada.  I thought it would be a great venue to get myself out there and I could simultaneously screen individuals that had the potential to be, or the qualities of a great movie buddy.  Now, I know that profile pictures are a land mine of sorts, and I hope you don't think I'm too selective by generally sticking to these rules:  first, if you have a doorag on, or a wifebeater on, or both--I'm sorry, it's just not going to work out between us.  Second, if you have reflective sunglasses on a la TOP GUN, I am not thinking how cool you are, I am thinking "What are you hiding?" or "Who are you hiding from?"  I guess you could turn out to be The Phantom of the Opera like the incomparable Gerard Butler, but I'm betting it's more like Quasimodo under there.  Third, if you state in your profile "To know me is to love me-believe dat," then maybe you need an ESL course because the last time I checked, DAT is the dental school entrance exam.  Lastly, if your thumbnail/username is BIGWILLY plus some number (meaning, unfortunately, that there is more than one BIGWILLY) or MACKTHEMAN, I think our priorities are different and we should go our separate ways.  Basically what I'm trying to say is fifteen dollars later, I'm back at square one.  I could have seen 2 matinees for that price-sheesh!

Well, lucky for me, I'm great company and I will just have to take myself to see the new Star Trek.